Procrastination VS. Constipation: What’s Worse?

4 Apr



Is this a coincidence that the two sort of rhyme?  Is it a strange juxtaposition?  Are they somehow related to one another or are they just similar? Personally, I’d put the two in the same category of “things that suck real bad”.  The worst part is that we probably all do the two at the same time.

Isn’t procrastination just mind constipation anyway?  I wish there was a pill for that; for creative block.  Or it’s just laziness.  Or lack of motivation.  Either way, scientists should really work on that.  The anti-procrastination pill.  I know a lot of people that’d be big fans.  It’d bring in millions.  There’d probably be some crazy side effect though.  Maybe it’d turn all your ideas into mush.  Or you’d grow an extra thumb.  All your time you’d typically spend procrastinating would then turn into time being spent trying to remember your original ideas because now all you can think about is unicorns and lollipops and things that you can do next. 

My father once said “My skill as a procrastinator has known no bounds.  I need to eliminate this aspect of myself and get f%#king moving.”  I recently forwarded that same text message to him, and he said he saved it in his outbox and it never fails to mock him. 

All jokes aside, I find constant procrastination more life threatening and painful than constipation.  I think it’s certainly more life shattering.  Maybe not in the moment, but in the end.  When faced with death, I’m afraid we’re going to be faced with missed opportunities and unrealized potential. 

Perhaps you’ve heard the phrase, why put off until tomorrow what you can put off until the day after tomorrow.  Procrastination is one of the most common diseases among the human race.  That and the sad fact that we always think we have more time. 

Time is never promised.  Time waits for no one.  A b%tch but true.  Also a true b*tch.  As my father said, let’s eliminate this aspect of ourselves and get f$%king moving.  It’s your life.  Do something about it.


One Response to “Procrastination VS. Constipation: What’s Worse?”

  1. TheDisfigured April 10, 2013 at 6:11 pm #

    Damn right.
    We all have a limited time on this planet. If our life was meaningless, it was our own fault.

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